...comfort of the familiar
"This World" by Zero 7 is playing, again it makes me feel homesick - for London. An odd sensation, still not feeling settled.
On Sunday, I sat with a friend in a room, just the two of us, watching each other. I hadn't seen him for so long, I didn't expect him to change, but on some level it felt different. He's the kind of person you meet where you pick up where you left off, but each time you meet something has changed between you, not necessarily in a bad way, but... I looked away and quietly said, "I still feel lost. Like I lose my balance. There are times when I listen to something and feel a little dizzy." He looked concerned and held my hand - his enormous palm engulfing my child-like fingers. "But you're doing your PhD, I thought that would stop." he said softly, in that lovely deep baritone voice of his. I shook my head. I need to find my feet. He squeezed my hand a little and I smiled.
There are those friends who you miss, there are those friends who you cannot live without and there are those friends who you will never lose. He falls in the last category. We're an odd couple. I never quite understood why he spoke to me to begin with. We were two very different people, we still are on some level, except now, I've learnt to truly trust what he says, really believe. "I'm only friends with those girls I 'click' with mentally, you're one of them. I feel free talking to you because you get me and I get you. The only time I get annoyed with you is when I don't understand what goes on in that little head of yours." he taps my temple. "Like last week, what was all that about? Although now, I understand."
Do I love him? Perhaps. Am I in love with him? Not anymore, thank goodness. He's arrogant, cocky, rude - but he's also one of those people I know who wouldn't judge me. He'll make fun of me, he'll tease me mercilessly about things, but deep down I know he'll be there for me, should I need him. There's just something so addictive about him that if I didn't have him in my life, I know I'd be missing something.
Wonder why "Sinnerman" is playing... what are you trying to tell me Nina?
On Sunday, I sat with a friend in a room, just the two of us, watching each other. I hadn't seen him for so long, I didn't expect him to change, but on some level it felt different. He's the kind of person you meet where you pick up where you left off, but each time you meet something has changed between you, not necessarily in a bad way, but... I looked away and quietly said, "I still feel lost. Like I lose my balance. There are times when I listen to something and feel a little dizzy." He looked concerned and held my hand - his enormous palm engulfing my child-like fingers. "But you're doing your PhD, I thought that would stop." he said softly, in that lovely deep baritone voice of his. I shook my head. I need to find my feet. He squeezed my hand a little and I smiled.
There are those friends who you miss, there are those friends who you cannot live without and there are those friends who you will never lose. He falls in the last category. We're an odd couple. I never quite understood why he spoke to me to begin with. We were two very different people, we still are on some level, except now, I've learnt to truly trust what he says, really believe. "I'm only friends with those girls I 'click' with mentally, you're one of them. I feel free talking to you because you get me and I get you. The only time I get annoyed with you is when I don't understand what goes on in that little head of yours." he taps my temple. "Like last week, what was all that about? Although now, I understand."
Do I love him? Perhaps. Am I in love with him? Not anymore, thank goodness. He's arrogant, cocky, rude - but he's also one of those people I know who wouldn't judge me. He'll make fun of me, he'll tease me mercilessly about things, but deep down I know he'll be there for me, should I need him. There's just something so addictive about him that if I didn't have him in my life, I know I'd be missing something.
Wonder why "Sinnerman" is playing... what are you trying to tell me Nina?
posted by Lunar Chick @ 12:47 pm
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